Anticipating the incoming hordes of looters and vandals due to the reduction of Public Safety and Public Works personal, Ron Kim and Skip Scirocco have formed a new blue ribbon committee headed by Lou Benton to recommend new signage to remind our new guests that this is Saratoga and not Arbor Hill. The first sign encouraging proper public restroom etiquette has already been a big success in the newly named Keehn Public Restrooms in CongressPark. Ron Kim is hoping for additional federal stimulus money for Spanish language signs to encourage our Hispanic visitors to behave as well.
Due to the rash of drunken employee incidents Scirocco has been said to be instituting tougher alcohol guidelines in the city garage.
To the brain dead this is a parody not a word of it is true.